I’m traveling overseas this week. While away I’ll be working and writing — it shouldn’t feel any different for you. While preparing I had a brief freak out. I told myself, “it’s okay, we got this, and chill the #!@# out.”Surprisingly, that worked.

Machiavelli writes that a prince should avoid founding their state on the people — avoid creating an organization for people by people. I think that’s because people are self-interested. I am watching “Game of Thrones” now. I imagine if Machiavelli would write a television series, “Game of Thrones” would likely be it. I enjoy seeing concepts from “The Prince” played out in that fictional world. I’m at a point in the show where Daenerys Targaryen is establishing her state. She has a belief in a state for and of free people — where slavery doesn’t exist. Daenerys doesn’t listen to her council, founds her state on the people, she ignores the effectual truth in favor of her ideals, and struggles. Why? People are largely self-interested.What are the implications for the savvy leader?Build upon an idea. Spread the idea and discover those that want to opt-in to the change you want to make.Exclude. There are people who are not meant for your work, they don’t belong in your “state.” Remove them. Recruit and lead. You don’t need to have dragons to create compliance. If you’re skilled, inspire people to want to build upon your idea and make it better. Punishments rarely make work better. Balance ideals with realism. See the world as it is, not as you hope it to be. If you want to make change happen, you must deal with what’s in front of you. I know of one leader, and reader of this blog, that sees the world as it is. She’s got a great idea to connect aging populations with experiences they want, and she gets people. She’s an effective idealist.

More than a decade ago, I sailed on the m/s Zaandam and met a fascinating woman named Veronika. Veronika worked in the shops. A well-read woman, I would often see her sitting in the passenger cafeteria on sea days with a book and a tea. We were friends, and one day I sat down and asked about the book. More than a decade later, I now own my own copy of “The Master and Margarita”, by Mikhail Bulgakov. I started reading a few pages and I’m hooked. I enjoy the descriptions of Moscow, the language used, and Bulgakov’s wit. I don’t often read fiction; and I’m glad I’m starting.

If you’re vacationing to get away from it all because life is stressful, what good is the vacation if you arrive at your destination still stressed?It’s not the distance from the problem that matters; it’s how you manage yourself.

Seth Godin wrote about consequences the other day. He cites the “Seven Social Sins” popularized by Gandhi. I pasted them below. I am not going to comment on our culture. Instead, I am going to ask how you interpret these “social sins” relative to your values? Tolstoy suggested that culture and society are improved from the inside the out. If that’s remotely true, then what might matter is not how we see others show up in society, but how we choose to show up for each other. Wealth without work.Pleasure without conscience.Knowledge without character.Commerce without morality.Science without humanity.Religion without sacrifice.Politics without principle.

I just finished Leo Tolstoy’s “A Calendar of Wisdom.” The book is Tolstoy’s curated collection of insights and ideas from great thinkers and great books. The entry for December 31st got me thinking:“The past does not exist. The future has not begun. The present is an infinitely small point in time in which the already nonexistent past meets the imminent future. At this point, which is timeless, a person’s real life exists. Time does not exist. There is only a small and infinite present, and it is only in this present that our life occurs. Therefore, a person should concentrate all his spiritual force only on this present.” A powerful meditation to start off the new year. Consider picking up this book - even from the library.

Good leaders know how to expand the world of those in their charge.

Apparently, the likelihood that your judgments are accurate — noise and bias free — may rise or fall with your mood. If that’s true, take an inventory of your mood and emotions before making big decisions.

Do I understand you?I imagine your life is a mix of ups and downs. You wake up dreading what’s to come. You ask, “why am I doing this? What have I gotten myself into?”I imagine you wish someone would help you. You tell people in your life what’s happening in your life, but it seems like nobody listens. Don’t they see you struggle.I imagine you find life overwhelming. Every day one new thing to track. One new bill to pay. One new fire to put. And, maybe for you, one new rabbit hole to go down. You can’t keep doing this, you just need a break. Why can’t others see you need a break?I can imagine these things because I’ve listened to many people over many years talk about their lives. But to imagine is not the same as understand. I don’t want to understand you.What you think you seek is “understanding” but what you actually seek is “being acknowledged.”Acknowledgment, in the way I am using the word, means to be “seen” or “perceived.” To have your humanity “recognized.” To say I “understand” your humanity is to rob you of your experience. You don’t want your experience stolen from you, I think you want it “recognized.”Why is it so hard to see people recognizing us?Perhaps because we want people not only to recognize us but do something for us. We want the recognition of our situation to compel action — some argue that’s called “sympathy.” A person can be skilled at “recognizing” but not sympathetic; and someone can be sympathetic but not skilled at recognizing. What’s my preference?My preference is to be skilled at recognizing someone’s humanity. I prefer people recognize me for my humanity too. I don’t need/want sympathy; what I need is another pair of eyes looking back at me and saying, “I see you.”

Brian, a friend of the blog, shared this quote with me.“We usually compare our rough drafts to others’ final drafts.” I almost believe this blog is several rough drafts away from a final draft. I think of my life the same way — every day that came before is a rough draft. What else?